Three Day Stretch

I'm in the three day stretch right now. We get paid on Thursdays. There's always a "you can do it, just make it to Thursday" feel Monday thru Wednesday. I have been sticking to the budget since my last post. Just following along like a good girl has already got me feeling much much better. That blindfolded, denial state is such a bad place to be in.

I wanted to say thanks to everyone who commented on the "Do you Budget" post. It seems that there are a lot of woman out there budgeting and handling the finances for their families. As my husband is completely un-interested in any of our financial affairs I appreciate your comments. It's nice to know others are out their walking a very similar path.

Of the day's I've kept track of my spending I'm averaging $14.13 a day. It's been a bit too long since I've posted a daily spending update. I'm quite glad to finally be back at it.

Happy Monday!

Today's lovely: The beautiful orange azalea bush in our front yard. It's blooming right now and just gorgeous. I feel bad for that little bush because it gets attacked by ice falling off the roof every single winter. It has hardly had a chance to grow ever since we planted it about 5 years ago but it still blooms with the most gorgeous orange flowers every year. It's a trooper, a lovely little trooper.

Saturday Reality Check

I'm back to making itty bitty baby steps, crawling in fact.

My one financial goal right now is to budget for our income. I have not been succeeding lately. It feels horrible. I'm used to paying down debt. I'm used to winning those little battles like, "should I buy the frappuccino or the $1 coffee from McDonalds?" I'm used to moving payment amounts and dates around to make up for hubby's spending. But lately... ugh, lately I'm just trying to figure out how to pay all the bills and buy some groceries and not have to borrow money from overdraft every single week.

Two side trail rants: 1.) I have this horrible HORRIBLE defense mechanism almost. When money gets really tight I almost go into denial and I just avoid looking at the account, avoid tracking what's being spent, and avoid the reality of how much we actually have. I lived that way for so long and it "worked" (haha) because we always had credit we could use. Now, I'm trying (not actually succeeding 100% right now) to not use credit but I'm still falling back into this awful denial state. I guess the first step to any problem is identifying it. I know, I have to watch what is being spent and spend what is being taken in. I know this. But I freak out when our income drops down (my hours vary at work) and when Murphy stops by (he's been by alot lately) and I just close my eyes. That's my confession for the day.

Rant 2.) Why is it okay for the government to spend and spend and spend and spend like there's no end to their income but for the rest of us real life and real economic laws apply? You cannot spend money you don't have! You can borrow and borrow and borrow but even then their comes a point when you don't have enough to pay back what you've borrowed (make minimum payments). I'm SO mad at the government right now. The US owe's $59 TRILLION dollars right now. And we're spending about $100,000 a second. I'm trying to clean up my mess. But I am so sick of our elected officials making a mess that technically we as the people of the US are responsible for cleaning up. Why is it okay for them to be SO irresponsible? Why?

Sorry.
 
Okay, for today:
I scheduled most of next month's payments online.
I sat down and wrote out this week and next weeks budgets so I can show my husband exactly what we have and where it needs to go.
I recorded the past several days spending on the spending page of this blog.
I'm FINALLY posting a blog. (it's about time)
And I pulled all the weeds in the front flower beds.
That last one was my favorite accomplishment for the day. I LOVE yard work! It was sort of my reward for actually sitting down and addressing the finances that have been terrifying me lately.

Well that's where I've been. Hope you're all doing stupendously well!

Happy Mothers Day to all the "not quite yet" Moms

When I was a child my mom used to tell me that she loved me even when I was just a twinkle in her eye. I knew what she meant but I never really understood until the day my husband and I welcomed our son into the world. We were married for just about 10 years before our son was born. 10 years is a very long time to hope for your dream come true. The one thing I always wanted to be was a mom. But for 32 years all I could really do was watch everyone else enjoy their go at the one thing my heart longed most for. When I met my son for the first time I felt as if I'd always known him and ALWAYS loved him. I believe I was born with that twinkle in my eye just like my mom was; I was born already loving him.

I've always felt like a mom. I've loved kids since I was a kid. My puppies and our cat are truly children to us. I saw a video at church about orphans in Guatemala and I spent four weeks there because I felt God say, "Go, be a mom."

There is a pain that only a "not quite yet" mom knows. A pain that stabs every single time a friend's pregnancy is announced. A pain that pierces every time a beautiful little one is welcomed into the world. A pain that causes the most loving women to turn her head away from someone else's infant. All the little joys of the little mommies are almost unbearable to a not quite yet mom. Today I am only hoping to ease that pain a little. To all the not quite yet moms out there, to everyone with a twinkle in their eye, and also to the puppy and kitty mommas I wish you all a VERY Happy Mother's Day!!! If you have that twinkle or that furry loved one you most certainly are a mom. The rest of the world might not see it, but your heart knows it. Rejoice in who you are mommy! Your  furry little one(s) and your little one(s) to be could wish for no one more spectacular than you. Happy Mothers Day to you too!!!

If we hope for what we do not see we eagerly wait for it with perseverance.
Romans 8:25 NKJV

Do You Budget?

Has anyone else noticed that May is almost half over?

I've been in such a haze. It really feels so icky to fall down, no matter what your path is. Whether you're embarking upon a health path, career, relational, a sport or hobby, or a financial path falling off just sucks. <Shake it off, shake it off> Spring is in full bloom. My back is finally starting to feel a bit better. Every day is a new day.

Have you ever wondered how many people sit down and budget every week? I've been seriously thinking about that today. Generally I have a solid budget every week/ month. When I set it, when I stick to it life is pretty great. There's very little to worry about when you know that your money is behaving. Granted you have to say no to things you cannot afford. You have to actually think about your purchases. And you have to put effort into planning your pennies' purpose. But I'm pretty sure that most people just collect a pay check and spend money with very little thought involved. I do not think most people budget.

Okay, you are reading a financial blog but really truly curious, do you follow a weekly budget? Do you know what's coming in, what's going out and where it's going? Or do you just collect a paycheck and then spend it?

Summary

I've been absent for a bit. April was difficult. Murphy came a knocking (Murphy's law: Anything that can go wrong will go wrong). I do not like blogging when I'm in a "whoa is me" state.

For your reading pleasure here's an April recap:
Here in Michigan it rained and rained and rained and rained.
The basement flooded. We don't have a finished basement thank goodness but three to four inches of water downstairs is never a good thing. I hurt my back quite badly trying to take care of the mess. We did get the water out, along with tons of ruined stuff. Then two days later the furnace decided that it hadn't liked sitting in  all that water and stopped working. We had a cold house for a few days until the furnace guy came. It took him about 3 minutes to fix the problem but we still had to pay him (obviously). Our front door meanwhile decided to break. It was a little issue but still, please can every bit of our house rebel all at once?!?! After a week of my back getting progressively worse I decided that I needed to see the chiropractor. My health insurance does not include chiropractic work. Yep, another nice expense to throw onto the April pile. She said it will be a slow healing process. Yay me! Additionally our van has started to make a scary clunky noise while turning. I'm scared to even find out what this new expense will be. In April I ended up using the credit card. I feel like poop.

It is now May and I'm hoping Murphy and his shenanigans have left the building.

"April Showers Bring May Flowers"

Oh, oh I certainly hope so! There were SO MANY showers.

$11 a day

I wrote a long insightful post yesterday and then my one year old son deleted it.
WHY does that happen!?!?!?

In other news my average daily spending for April is: $11.02

HOORAY!!!

Oh, I've been so down and out about income, money, financial FUN lately that I haven't even been able to bring myself to blog about it. I just don't want to "whoa is me" post after post. BUT it's April 20, ten days to go and I'm at my goal of $11 a day for the month. That's a little something for me to smile about  : )

The Lovely: Last night my husband and I got away from the norm, total date night, and saw the Proclaimers. The show was so SO so GREAT!

Halfway Through April

Woah, it's been almost a week since my last post. Hope life has been treating you all well. I've just been normal working mommy busy.

I'm giggling a bit because my daily average for April is NOT $11 a day (my goal this month) but it is really close to my overall goal of $12 a day. I think I just need to way undershoot what ever I'm trying to actually accomplish and then maybe I can hit my mark.

Average daily spending for April: $12.66

Today's lovely: Three birds bathing in a sidewalk puddle. I don't know why seeing birds washing themselves in puddles is so fascinating to me. But each time I happen upon the sight I can't help but glow a little bit on the inside. I love it. I love watching them shake their little wings in the water and ruffle the wet feathers on their heads. To me a bathing bird always looks as if it's playing a game of sorts. Lovely!

Debt Quote Tuesday

Let no debt remain outstanding, except the continuing debt to love one another.
Romans 13:8 NIV

Getting out of debt is really really important to me. I lament having gone into it but there's no rewinding time. Now I must do what needs to be done in order to clean up my messes. All the while I must remind myself that life is for living. We can love each other, enjoy each other, and embrace the beauty of every single day without spending a penny or owing one cent more. That is encouraging to me.

Finding balance in virtually any area of life is probably impossible, at least I am unable to believe that it can be found, but working at balance constantly is dire. Love, live, be responsible, work hard, enjoy, shine, do right, do good; I guess life is for multi-taskers. I'm working at it.

Average daily spending for April: $11.47
Yep, I'm almost back to my April goal: $11 a day.

Today's lovely: Tickle time with my son. I LOVE his giggles!!!

Monday, Mostly Made It

I picked up a few essentials and ONLY essentials at the grocery store.
I made dinner at home.
I went a little over my goal of being at $12.75 a day spending for April so far.
I'm ready for a NO SPEND day tomorrow, #20 for the year.

THEN after dinner I needed ice cream. It's a little early in the year to be needing ice cream. Usually just before summer hits some freakish part of me turns on the ice cream switch and daily for a solid three months I feel as though I will perish unless I consume a little ice cream. Well tonite that old familiar feeling returned. I came so close to running out and purchasing ice cream. And I don't think it would have been a $2 or $4 gallon from the grocery store. No I would have gone for Cold Stone or TCBY. BUT, and I say this with tons of self satisfaction (and also fear that I may be facing this monster for the next four months) I did not buy, waste money on, overly exceed my budget because of, or eat any ice cream this evening.

And Monday is done! Wishing a fabulously Happy Birthday to my little Sister!!!

Average daily spending for April: $12.90
My goal is $11 a day for April
If I pull of a NO SPEND day tomorrow I'll be at $11.47

Today's lovelies: Spring rain... pretty happy it's not snow. Remembering when I was just 8 years old and I brought my brand new baby sister (the one I'd be hoping for for YEARS) to show and tell at school. And watching my little munchkin run around our home and babble away.

Let Week Two Begin

My blogs are getting silly, "today I only want to spend $3... NO SPEND, NO SPEND, blah, blah, blah."

Alas, I continue the mumbo jumbo. I have enough food in the house for two meals which gets me feeling all excited that I can pull of a NO SPEND today BUT I need some baby items. Today's goal is to buy as little as humanly possible in order to get through a NO SPEND tomorrow. (Yesterday was a NO SPEND day) I am still trying to accomplish an every other day goal this month.

Just because I'm spending money today does not mean I can be purchasing chocolate. It doesn't give me permission to buy snacks or soda. I am not allowed to pick up a few odds and ends. Bare minimum that is my goal.

This is one of those morning pep talk blogs. I feel like if I just put it out there then I'll stay the course. Hoping to have my daily average for April down to $12.75 by this evening! That give me $6.57 for today.

Here goes!

Discouraged? Nope.

My average daily spending is MUCH higher than I'd like it to be. I've bought I think six "things" in about a week. That's a ton! I haven't been knocking out as many NO SPEND days as I'd like. I can't believe how tight things are financially speaking at present. I've stolen most of the money from the emergency fund to keep the checking account in the black... it's not stealing per-se. Oh, and my house is a piggysty.

I'm trying not to be too hard on myself. I went that route the first year of this blog. That type of "motivation" does not work for me. I learned that when I focus on my failures I feel like a failure and I crumble. This leaves me feeling a bit torn right now. I want to recognize that I'm not doing great with my financial plan but I also want to recognize what I am doing well. Positive reinforcement seems to be what motivates me.

On the down side my average daily spending for 2013 is: $14.79

On the up side:
I have not been purchasing coffee shop coffee. I think I've finally broke this horrible habit/ addiction.
Outside of the $12 a day budget expenses for my son are going down; he's no longer drinking formula.
I'm learning to shop less with the NO SPEND challenge and it's helping me to spend less too.
I've been bringing food to work with me pretty regularly.
We've been eating out MUCH much less.
Although my husband hasn't changed his spending habits much he does seem to be more understanding of my frugal decisions. This is a HUGE step in the right direction.
I'm up to 19 NO SPEND days this year.
I'm growing, moving forward, baby stepping my way up; I am winning!

Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day. You shall begin it serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Wrapping up week one of April

Yowzers and oops.

Okay so I don't think it's horrific but my $9 a day in April just went to about $13. And my "things" purchases jumped from 10 this year to 13.

I bought some socks for my kiddo. I got a birthday present for my sister. I purchased a fan for my son's room; hoping it will help him sleep better. He's been having a TERRIBLE time sleeping since he got sick (it's been over two weeks now). He's mostly better, it seems, but still not sleeping well. I took advantage of the clearance Easter candy. I bought enough food to last thru Monday. And wala, $9 goes to $13.

I've been bombing on the NO SPEND days too but there is a silver lining to that rain cloud. At least when I plan a NO SPEND day I do not buy any food at work. I don't buy any groceries. I don't buy any little unnecessary luxuries, like chocolate. My no spend bombs have so far always been something that's not even apart of my $12 a day budget; like goats milk for my son (because the store I was at had run out and I ended up having to pick some up the next day), or gasoline for the car because there wasn't enough money in the bank on Wednesday when I bought groceries and then on my planned Thursday NO SPEND when we got paid I had to buy gas. And one of my NO SPEND bombs was because my husband brought home some food item... that does come out of the $12 a day though.

Different bloggers have different criteria for a NO SPEND. Just to clarify any spending, anything I buy, purchase, have to pay for disqualifies a NO SPEND. I do set automatic payments online for all of our bills each month. I do not pay super close attention to what days those payments come out of the account because it's already factored into my monthly budget SO if I do not buy anything on a Monday and my mortgage payment goes through on said Monday that is still a NO SPEND day. I did not "buy" anything. In other words bills do not count. Everything else does. I cannot think of one single exception. I guess none of that really needed to be clarified but I have been talking about NO SPEND days ALOT lately... they've really been helping me keep my spending down; giving me a bit more of a feasible goal to shoot for on a regular basis and so that is that.

Average daily spending for April: $13.63

A Few Good Days

Average daily spending for April: $9.34

AND I'm planning a NO SPEND day for tomorrow!

Yeah, yeah we're only three days in but SO FAR SO GOOD.
I am planning a $20 purchase (on top of groceries) on Friday and hoping this great start will help cover some of that.

Woohoo  : )

Debt Quote Tuesday/ $11 a Day

Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day. You shall begin it serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

My average daily spending for the year is up to $14.65. That's $212 over budget for the year. One might say "Ah, $212 that's not so bad." But I'd have to cut almost $1 a day out of my budget for the rest of the year in order to catch that back up. A dollar a day, I'm learning is actually quite a lot of money.

Today I will take advice from Emerson and start a new. Today is a new day! I'm going to attempt $11 a day spending for the month of April. I may be up to a $14.65 average but that is in the past, now begins the future. Onward and upwards we go.

Thanks so much everyone for all the comments on the Easter basket post. You guys are awesome!

Dare to live the life you have dreamed for yourself. Go forward and make your dreams come true.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

April

I love the fresh start that comes with the beginning of each month. At least I pretend it's a fresh start.
At present I'm feeling compelled to make a long list of everything I'd like to accomplish this month BUT I'm going to start out slow.

As I mentioned before, money is abnormally tight around here. The main thing I need to do is keep track of the pennies. I don't want to go into overdraft a billion times this month. I don't want to get to that point, a point I'm used to arriving at, where all of the sudden we're $300 over budget for the month and I have to pull money from each credit card payment. I'm paying the minimums this month and it still doesn't look like we have enough SO going $300 over budget is NOT an option.

So, for April my main objective is to be a grown up, a responsible grown up.
Along with that I need to work with my husband; keep him on track and informed monetarily speaking. Going way over the household monthly budget is not usually my doing.
I'm also going to attempt to not buy food at work.
I really enjoyed the every other day NO SPEND challenge these past two weeks so I will try to keep that up for all of this month too. 32 NO SPEND days by the end of April would be pretty cool. Gee, 30 would be great.
And I want to get my average daily spending down a bit this month. That means spending less than $12 a day. I've done it before. A little determination and planning will get me through.

Average daily spending: $14.83
I'm pretty happy that it's back under $15 a day. That was a bit scary. I do not want to go there again.
Oh, and I shopped today so tomorrow "should" be a NO SPEND. Nice!

So What if I am Cheap

I was contemplating whether to blog about it but it's been on my mind... this saving money, financial responsibility, and also spending wisely route is an odd one. Controversial even.

Yesterday was Easter. I spent all of March looking at Easter baskets and little trinkets at the store. I almost bought a basket. Then it dawned on me that there was defiantly an old one upstairs. I have mine from when I was a kid (my mom always used the same baskets for us kids each year). Next came the fillings. I kept looking at little toys, picking things in my mind that would be perfect, and then deciding that he just didn't need any of them.

I ended up buying two greeting cards and getting a stuffed bunny for free (a birthday card for my hubby and a wedding card for a friend). It's the cutest bunny and my boy LOVES stuffies. Then I decided to get him that water bottle. He really likes mine and I thought he'd enjoy having his own little kid one. When I went upstairs to get the basket I found a few little hand-me-down books that a friend had given us. I forgot about them so they were new, sort of. They were quite perfect being very springy. There's a bunny, a bee, and a duck one. I also put a few empty plastic eggs in his basket.

I thought I'd done a very good job. I only spent $13 for the entire basket (on the water bottle) and he was really excited about his basket. He loves the bunny, the bottle, the books, and he's been playing with the empty eggs constantly. For a one year old anything new is so exciting.

WELL, we went to my sister in laws house for Easter dinner. She has a little boy who's 2 months younger than my son. He was playing with all these new toys, and they kept saying, "he got that in his Easter basket." Honestly, I think they spent $60 on his Easter basket (maybe not that much). At one point after all the, "he got that in his..." My husband says, "Abner just got a water bottle and some old books." I felt so very insulted. I had put TONS of thought into that "cheap" basket. And my son has really been enjoying everything in it.

Okay, my husband has since apologized for seemingly insulting me. Believe it or not he is starting to get it. He said he didn't mean to hurt my feelings and that I did a very good job with our boy's first basket. But to a normal person I'm a freak. I bought ONE thing for my son's first Easter basket. That could be bad parenting in some circles. (I know some people don't do baskets (that's NOT what it's about) but my mom always made Easter really neat for us and I want to pass down the tradition) I'm pretty secure now in my frugal decisions. My kid doesn't need a bunch of new expensive things. He's a VERY happy little boy. I don't need reassurance that I'm making the right decisions; trying to get out of debt instead of spending money on fancy things. But I sure do seem like a freak to "normal" folks and I certainly felt like one last night.

Controversial really comes in when I mention that my sister in law, last I knew gets food stamps, free schooling from the government, practically all their taxes back, free child care; you get the idea. I am NOT trying to insult her even if I don't agree with a lot of her decisions. I'm simply saying I'm very okay with giving my boy a "cheap" basket and paying for all of my own food.

BUDGET

NO SPEND day number 17 is a success!

Today I NEED to write down a detailed budget for this week. I have a spread sheet in Excel that I use to budget each month but something about writing down the budget on paper for the week makes it really real. And it makes it easier for me to say no when my husband asks to make a silly purchase that we do not "need" at present.

I've been doing pretty well with my spending but money is getting TIGHT around here. My hours have been a bit slow on top of my cutting 8 hours a week out of my work schedule. Gasoline has been a bit pricy. I've actually been worried for the first time in a long time that we might not make ends meet over the next few months. I need to get really serious and assign every dollar coming in a responsibility. Then I need to be even more serious and say no to all the stuff that doesn't have dollars assigned to it. This is for real. This is where credit cards become real tempting and convenient. I do NOT want to go down that road again, EVER!

Tomorrow should be a NO SPEND day as well. That'll make 18 total for the first 3 months of the year. That puts me about 7 below quota if I'm truly shooting for 100 NO SPENDs this year. Not bad, not bad at all.

This and That

Driving down the expressway today with sunglasses on and the air rushing over the open sunroof felt like the best moment ever. Hooray for spring finally peeking out from behind the long cold winter!!!

I think I bought enough groceries today to last until Monday. This means a possible 2 more NO SPEND days in March. We'll see... ugh, I'm already thinking of things we "might" need. More milk of course.

Average daily spending: $15.02
I bought a few bigger things today, actual things. In my terminology a "thing" purchase is something that doesn't get used up, isn't food; a CD is a thing purchase. Toilet paper is not. I'm only up to 10 things on my items list for this year. 3 of them happened today. I had to pick up some CD-R's to back up photos and because my hubby burns all of his CD's to CD-Rs so they don't get wrecked when he's listening to them in the car. I purchased a nice water bottle, a Camelbak for my boy. I'm going to put it in his Easter basket. He's been using mine a lot and I'd like him to have his own. And I bought a pillow cover for him. He gets a pillow in his bed now. He's getting an old used pillow from our upstairs but I wanted him to have a nice allergy free waterproof cover for it. I can't believe I'm over $15 a day. Yikes that's pretty bad.

Hoping for good things in April; in other words good planning, strong self control, and no unexpected big expenses!

Mission accomplished!

I only bought dog food today.

Average daily spending: $14.43